What is your reaction when someone tells you that you can’t do something? In many cases, these people are usually well-intentioned and don’t mean to dash your hopes and dreams but all too many times that is exactly what they do.
Or they are mean spirited haters who just want to purposely rain on your parade. These are the folks who are just so scared to ever leave their own comfort zone that the thought of you doing something daring or courageous is somehow threatening.
Then there are those that don’t say a word. They don’t say anything discouraging but you can tell by their reaction that they think you are crazy for attempting what you are attempting.
Back in 2001 I began writing a novel. I was in the middle of a very painful divorce and I needed something to occupy my mind. I had been writing little articles and poems and things and my best friend, who had read every word I had ever written said, “You know what? I can really see all this in a book.” That was how it started.
I didn’t know what the result would be when I started. I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I had a story to tell and I had to tell it. I never considered to whom I’d be telling the story. It didn’t matter then because all I wanted to do was write.
Now, I hope the “real” writers don’t get offended. I mean, isn’t it every writer’s dream to be on somebody’s best seller list? To sell millions of copies? That was never my goal or my intention. I won’t be quitting my day job in order to write. Not because I don’t think I can, but because that’s not my goal. It’s that simple. Of course, I didn’t know that wasn’t my goal at the time. Once the novel was complete I took the traditional route of getting an agent and having her pound the pavement, peddling my manuscript trying to garner interest from a publishing house.
Little did I know, she wasn’t pounding anything. I was one of many authors that she represented and although she may have thought I had written a good story she didn’t have a vested interest in my project. It wasn’t as important to her as it was to me. She couldn’t convince a publisher of how relevant my story was because she didn’t believe in the project the way I did. Publishers are in the business to make money. Period. I didn’t have a money-making track record so they decided to pass on my story. They all decided to pass.
This morning I pulled out my stack of rejection letters from 2001/2002. They all basically said the same thing and after the first couple I really became numb to the rejection.
That was when I reevaluated what my actual goals were:
*I wanted to see my novel published.
*I wanted to leave something tangible behind that said I was here.
*I wanted to do something that would make my children proud.
*I also wanted at least one person that I did not know to read my story and tell me that it touched them in some way.
That was when I made the decision to publish the book myself. I couldn’t let the rejection stop me from reaching my goals. I had to do this for me. Finally, in September 2004 I received my first copy of Raymond’s Daughters and I cannot even begin to tell you how it feels to accomplish something that no one thought you could accomplish. During this entire process the only person who consistently stayed in my corner and encouraged me was my best friend who planted the seed in my head in the first place. He assisted me with the editing, actually gave me the name of the book and once it was completed he BOUGHT ten copies and gave them as gifts to people. I later received an e-mail from one of the recipients and she explained why the story struck a chord with her.
There were those who stood on the sidelines with their arms folded in disbelief. There were others who said (and still say) “You wrote a book?” as if it would be incomprehensible that I could put two sentences together let alone an entire novel. There are even those who make it their mission to point out, “She self-published because no one else wanted it.” **shrugs** Maybe not.
Regardless of those people that continually try to keep my spirit down I’m proud of the fact that I reached the goals that I set. I’ve learned how important it is to always keep my eyes on the prize (so to speak). I know how important it is not to be deterred from what I set out to do. People will talk. People will always talk. I’ve learned to consider the source and keep on stepping.
