Note: The following post contains content of a sexual nature that some may find objectionable. Or not. You’ve been warned.
There is an article in this month’s Ess.en.ce entitled, “My Secret Sex Life”. It profiles four beautiful, professional Black women who have interesting items on their sexual menus: one is an author of erotic poetry, one sells sex toys, one role plays as a submissive and finally, the last one is behind the camera during the making of erotic films.
I’m not exactly sure why this information is noteworthy but when I saw these women in Es.sen.ce it just made me think. Are these particular activities that out of the ordinary? Are they that shocking? Will you read the article and gasp? I didn’t.
Okay, so I got to thinking that maybe I’m just a big freak and I need to check myself. Or maybe Black women are categorically more sexually repressed than other women and Es.sen.ce is trying to tell us to loosen up. I’ve penned an erotic poem or two; I’ve never sold a sex toy but I’ve bought a few; I’ve played the submissive fully equipped with handcuffs (or silk scarves) and I’ve been in front of a camera more than once. Damn, maybe I should check myself.
Are Black women more sexually repressed?
My first husband once told me that sexually aggressive women were unattractive. He said this to me after I tried to initiate sex with him. My feelings were so hurt. It would be about a dozen years before I could initiate sex again. Looking back, I think he probably couldn’t get it up and wanted to make me feel bad for reminding him of that. Bastard.
I remember an encounter with my second husband where I would tease him in the nether region and say to him, “Tell me what you want”. You know, he could not say the words su.ck my di.ck. When I asked him about it later his response was, “There are some things you just can’t say to your wife.” WTF? Then who the hell can you say it to? I’m not saying I wanted him to disrespect me in the street … but I figured that since we were married, in the privacy of our home ANYTHING GOES.
Maybe the question should be: Are men intimidated by sexually aggressive women and therefore making the women self-conscious about their sexuality?
Thoughts?
What is meant to be will be
