It's never too late to offer or accept an apology.
Lucky for me.
History Lesson: I have always hated apologizing. Let me rephrase that ... I never believed I needed to apologize for anything because I never believed I ever did anything wrong. Ever. I was the type of person who believed that everything I ever did (whether it hurt you or not) was justifiable and therefore did not warrant an apology.
Is that arrogance or what?
Fast forward several years. I told ya'll how my daughter's step team provided an opportunity for my (second) ex-husband and I to become friends. That is still so weird ... I mean, I carried around so much bitterness toward that man for so long -- I never thought that we could actually sit next to each other in an auditorium, laughing and talking like we had been friends for years. I remember a while ago asking God to allow me to have a better relationship with him for the sake of my children. I had forgotten that prayer until just now. I guess God didn't.
We attended another step show tonight and as usual the SWAT team did a wonderful job. My ex and I were talking and I asked him if he and his fiancee had set a wedding date. He shook his head 'no', explaining that he was scared. I felt bad about that. I mean, I'm scared to get married again too but he's so young (33) and I just hope that he doesn't allow his fear to cripple him. He brought up alot of stuff that happened in our marriage, good and bad, and I was surprised that he remembered half that stuff. Like the first day we met:
Him: Yeah, it was a Saturday, September 5, 1992 -- you were wearing one of those half shirts and a pair of jeans. I saw your belly button (reflective pause) ... yeah I still remember that.
When we got married it didn't go over well with his mother. In other words, she hated the idea of her 20-year old son marrying a 28-year old, divorced woman with a child. I took it personally and always felt like she would never accept me into their family. As arrogant as I was, my attitude was "screw her -- her loss". Consequently, everytime he went home to visit, I never accompanied him. That really hurt his feelings but I thought I was justified. Why would I voluntarily put myself in an uncomfortable position with his mother? Not me!
I was wrong for that and tonight I apologized to him. He accepted.
What is meant to be will be
