*******
Let me preface this post by saying this: I am notorious for being a person who can hold a grudge. I’m not proud of it. Really. It’s only been since I entered my forties that I realized how unproductive it is to carry a grudge. Life is too short and I just don’t have the time or energy to hold onto all that excess baggage. It saps the grudge holder of energy and let’s be real … the person you’re holding the grudge against probably ain’t even thinking about your silly behind.
About 100 years ago when I was a college student at Northeastern University I saw my very first step show. I was eighteen years old and it was like nothing I had ever seen. The Q’s, Kappas, Alphas, and the Iotas (yes, the Iotas) were royalty on campus. Let’s not forget the ladies of Alpha Kappa Alpha, Delta Sigma Theta and Sigma Gamma Rho. It was like a different world and when we all got together it was something to behold. There was a sense of competition but at the end of the evening we were truly all family.
Last night I had the opportunity to witness this same sense of community and family. The Brandon Middle School SWAT (Stepping With Awesome Talent) team hosted its first step show of the 2005-2006 season. The purpose of the show was to introduce the new SWAT team to the faculty, parents and friends and at the same time present other teams from the area.
Other teams that represented were Independence Middle, Plaza Middle, Divas In Action (Green Run) and even the little ones from Parkway Elementary School came out and did their thing. The show was wonderful but I’m here to tell you that when the students on the Brandon SWAT team took center stage they let everyone in the place know whose house they were in. These sixth, seventh and eighth graders came out and showed their natural behinds.
I am not being bias because my daughter is on the team – honestly. These steppers step with passion and precision and I was blown away. They’ve been practicing for months and their dedication was apparent. The constant stomping I hear coming from my daughter’s bedroom everyday was all worth it. Last night I was out of my seat and screaming, especially when I saw my baby out there stepping like her very life depended on it. And something happened to me when I looked across the auditorium and saw my ex-husband doing the same thing.
We were sharing something. I had actually forgotten that we shared something so beautiful—our daughter. That once upon a time we were in love and our daughter was an expression of that love. Regardless of the problems that we had in the past all that was put aside last night and we were just there for her. It was actually pretty cool. When the show ended I walked out to the lobby to wait for my daughter. I saw my ex and normally we would have stayed in separate corners, but I made my way through the crowd toward him and when I reached him he held out his arms and we hugged each other.
What the hell?
That was weird because it had absolutely nothing to do with us but it was all about her. We automatically put aside any animosity that we may have been feeling and totally focused on our daughter. You have to understand a few things: this man is not welcome in my home and when he calls I don’t answer the phone. (You don't need to tell me how childish that is.) But last night we hugged, talked, laughed and after the show he gave us a ride home (I live next door to the school so my son and I walked to the show) and I invited him in. Wow, I'm like a real grown up!
You’re never too old to change you just have to make room for the possibility. Who knows – maybe I’ll get an invitation to the wedding.
I wouldn't go -- I don't really think I've grown that much.
What is meant to be will be
How the SWAT Team Helped Me to Grow
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Blessed by chele at 9:45 AM
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